FRIENDS AND WHAT COMES ALONG
Well, I have had friends…a lot for that matter; and there is one thing I have learnt and that is that; they are not perfect. If you want a perfect person then you are really going to wait till eternity but there are some that click more than the others. Some; you just get along from the very first day, for some it may take months and for some it could take years. For some you know you would eventually be friends and for some people you meet, you know that there is never going to be a meeting point no matter what happens. One lesson I have learnt in life is to accept people for who they really are and not try to change them. Common, I must tell you it can really be hard especially when you have to perhaps work together daily but it is more frustrating to want to change someone and for years you cannot find a trace of change.
Let’s look at it this way, you have you have this co-worker who is a talkative and you are this friendly but quiet person, you resume on a good Monday morning and this co-worker wants to chit-chat for the first four hours about every detail of the weekend’s events. Initially you endure it and after a while you are pissed, you keep nodding your head to signal you are still listening but when she asks for your opinion you reply; “about what?” Obviously your colleague knows you have not been listening and she feels bad. You then think probably next week she would refrain but it gets worse. So what happens every Monday when you resume work? I have learnt that you really have to accept your friend and colleague because the earlier the better for you.
You know it’s funny when we accept our siblings for who they are, we fight for years and at some point we just learn to flow with them, nothing they do gets at us and we protect them when they need help. But then, we want to do everything to change our friends and our relationships. We come into friendships and relationships with a list of expectations and when the person does not meet our expectations we tend to opt out. We imagine that there is a better person somewhere and then when we meet the next person and see that everybody seem to behave the same way we make conclusions that maybe there is actually no real friend but the real truth is that there is actually no perfect person.
So number one rule you should go along with in life is that there is no perfect person and you are going to accept people for who they really are. I cannot deny the fact that some people are easier to love than others but when circumstance or fate brings you with some people, then the earlier the better for you to start re-orientating you mind.
Forgiveness they say is what we do for ourselves and not for others; time and time again I have learnt that. Now take a look at this scenario; some has done something real bad to you and you are so hurt and offended. You get bottled up because you know the person might not apologize when you tell him, you lose your appetite and there is a scary frown plastered on your face, you transfer aggression on any other person you meet and create a wrong impression. And then you get home to sleep and for hours into the night you cannot get sleep, finally after some hours you catch some sleep shortly after which the day breaks. The next day your eyes are swollen and your head aches severely obviously due to the current stress and if not careful you begin to feel sick whereas the person that has hurt you has probably forgotten about it and the next day he comes to you with a big smile saying good morning. That infuriates you the more and the cycle continues. Whereas if you had just allowed your mind to let go, allow time to slowly  heal your wound and sleep over it by the next day you would have gotten back to normal and even when you want to present the situation to the person it would have been done in a more logical manner.
Well I am not presenting myself as perfect, in fact I am way far from it but this is what I have learnt from my interaction with numerous friends and I keep trying to live in this consciousness. I hope you learnt something too.